It's one of the commonest of all sexual problems. Recently, we did a survey of several thousand British males, and approximately 10 per cent of them said that they 'often' or 'sometimes' had this trouble. We found that it's commoner in younger men - which is not surprising, as there's a distinct tendency for it to improve with age. Men generally get better control as they grow older. However, a 2004 survey in Europe showed that middle-aged men still have this problem. Fortunately, good treatments are available.
The number 1 cause of premature ejaculation is an uncontrollable and overwhelming urge to ejaculate, produced from over-stimulation by your lover. This urge seems impossible to fight, or so people think! Your body reacts like this to ensure impregnation and the survival of our species. So basically it's a natural reaction. A natural reaction that you can alter. You know it can be altered because some men don't suffer from premature ejaculation and if it's a natural reaction it can't be a physical problem. So there is nothing medically wrong with you.
Premature ejaculation has been defined as persistent or recurrent ejaculation with minimal sexual stimulation before, during, or after intromission and before the patient wishes it. There have been a number of psychological approaches to treatment, though we could not find any papers that defined the effectiveness of these approaches. (read more on control premature ejaculation)
More on control premature ejaculation
Finally, there's no question that anxiety plays a part in many cases of premature ejaculation. If you're nervous, you're likely to come too quickly. That's why many males have discovered for themselves that a small amount of alcohol eases their nerves and makes them less likely to climax prematurely. But we wouldn't recommend alcohol as a treatment!
Although premature ejaculation is one of the most common male sexual disorders, it remains widely under-diagnosed and under-treated. Most physicians do not screen for premature ejaculation and patients are extremely reluctant to talk about the condition with their partners or health care professionals. premature ejaculation can have a significant impact on many aspects of a man's life. It can affect his and his partner's sexual satisfaction and their ability to build and maintain relationships - both sexual and non-sexual - and can impact a man's general sense of self-confidence.
The main cause of premature ejaculation is biological. Upon sexual stimulation and arousal, the normal physical responses for a man and a woman are similar. A man will achieve a climax and then ejaculate about two to three minutes after penetrating the vagina. Women will reach orgasm about 12 to 14 minutes after intercourse occurs. Many women do not achieve orgasm especially if only penetration of the vagina by the penis occurs during sexual activity. Many women achieve orgasm through other methods of sexual stimulation although for some, orgasm is not achieved under any circumstances nor with any type of stimulation. Roughly 10% of women fall into this category. Other causes of premature ejaculation include psychological factors such as marital and relationship issues; performance anxiety (with partners new to each other and especially in the inexperienced partner); fear (associated with concerns regarding getting caught or discovered, sexually transmitted diseases or potential pregnancy ); and guilt (believing the activity is sinful e.g., premarital or extramarital sex).
For many years, sex experts have tended to say that premature ejaculation is caused by early 'conditioning'. In other words, the man's early, rushed (and perhaps furtive) sexual experiences had to be quick - so as to avoid detection! The idea is that all this hectic rush 'conditions' him to climax as quickly as possible.
control premature ejaculation
Behavioral therapy is one possible approach for treating premature ejaculation. Most commonly, the "squeeze technique" is used. If a man senses that he is about to experience premature orgasm, he interrupts sexual relations. Then the man or his partner squeezes the shaft of his penis between a thumb and two fingers. The man or his partner applies light pressure just below the head of the penis for about 20 seconds, lets go, and then sexual relations can be resumed. The technique can be repeated as often as necessary. When this technique is successful, it enables the man to learn to delay ejaculation with the squeeze, and eventually, to gain control over ejaculation without the squeeze. Behavioral therapy helps 60% to 90% of men with premature ejaculation. However, it requires the cooperation of both partners. Also, premature ejaculation often returns, and additional behavioral therapy may be needed.
Your health professional may recommend that you and your partner practice specific techniques to help delay ejaculation. These techniques may involve identifying and controlling the sensations that lead up to ejaculation and communicating to slow or stop stimulation. Other options include using a condom to reduce sensation to the penis or trying a different position (such as lying on your back) during intercourse. Counseling or behavioral therapy may help reduce anxiety related to premature ejaculation.
"The impact premature ejaculation can have on men and their partners can be devastating for a relationship and, currently, there are no truly optimal therapies for premature ejaculation," says Jon L. Pryor, M.D., chairman and program director of the Department of Urologic Surgery at the University of Minnesota and lead investigator of the dapoxetine phase III clinical trials. "The results with dapoxetine are compelling. They demonstrate that, for the first time, a medicine can be taken by men on an on-demand basis and provide significant improvement in their premature ejaculation condition. The unique profile of dapoxetine translated into targeted treatment of premature ejaculation compared to existing therapies. There are meaningful improvements in this study across all primary and secondary endpoints, including a three-to-four fold increase in IELT."
Premature ejaculation should never be a problem for a considerate lover. A man is usually satisfied after he reaches a climax. If he reaches it before she does and doesn't help her to reach one also, he's inconsiderate whether he climaxes in 2 seconds or 5 hours. Most women take more than 20 minutes to climax with conventional penile-vaginal contact and only 4 minutes when they stimulate themselves because women know more about women than men do. (read more on control premature ejaculation)
control premature ejaculation - Tips
Some penile skin creams advertise that they help a man last longer. These products contain topical anesthetics that dull sensation in the penis. If you like to play with penile sensation, there's no harm in using them. But they're not a good idea for learning to last longer. They dull sensation. But the key to lasting longer is for the man to become more familiar with what he feels so he can back off from his point of no return while still remaining highly aroused.
The man-on-top (missionary) position can be fun, but it's harder for most men to control their ejaculatory timing, because they have to hold themselves up. Try making love with the woman on top. This position is more relaxing for men, and it often helps ejaculatory control.
